I Said, "I Do" - Now What?

The mysterious answer to this question is....the same things you were doing when you were dating and engaged. Pray for him, study the word, dream, communicate, and seek the counsel of an "older" woman. Too many times after a couple gets married they fall into a routine and forget the basic of maintaining a relationship. Then they are surprised one day when marriage is not all they expected it to be.

Fairytale stories have created a lot of false expectations and hopes for young woman. Forget Cinderella and Prince Charming....You are not her and he is not him! We live in the real world with all its sins, temptations, deceits, personalities, expectations, stresses, etc. Take Cinderella and Prince Charming out of the castle and they would not know what to do.

Here is the good news: You are going to sin and make mistakes in your marriage. He is going to sin and make mistakes in your marriage. BUT if you are a believer and follower of Christ you live in a world of forgiveness, change, and hope. This is so much better then a fairytale. To be able to walk through life together and learn to forgive one another, see God change one another, and to have the hope of Christ lived out in each other is a once in a lifetime experience.

Here is the bad news: Too many Christian couples forget to forgive one another, forget that God can change a person, and forget about the hope of Christ in one another. If you are keeping a long list of the ways your husband has "wronged" you - STOP. Choose to forgive, believe that God can change him, and hope for Christ to increase in his life.

Every time you think about the "wrong" do as Philippians 4:8-9 says, "Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things. Whatever you have learned or received or heard from me, or seen in me—put it into practice. And the God of peace will be with you." This takes practice and is an on going process. For example, just the other day my mind went back to a wrong my husband did 14 years ago. I had to capture that thought and say to myself, "You have forgiven him and he is not the same man he was back then. God has done a great work in him."

My dear sisters, the forgiveness you and your husband display to each other demonstrates the forgiveness Christ has for us. Your marriage may be the example that leads someone to Christ.