Make an Effort

I heard this term one morning this week on a Christian radio station. It was used in reference to: What husbands really want from their wives, but are afraid to tell them. Can you guess what it is?

Make an effort in your physical appearance

The men were not talking about weight, the perfect body, having no wrinkles, etc. Their heart was to express how much it means to them when their wives make an effort to eat healthy, exercise, wear nice clothes, do their hair, etc.

Here are some truths I have come to realize about men:

1. Men are visual. Like it or not, it is the way God has created them. They love the female form, how we take care of it, and how we "dress" it up.
   
2. Most men are not as hung up about our bodies as we are. I say "most men" because I know there are some men who have brought into the lies of our culture about how women should look. Most husbands want their wives to be healthy. If you feel you have to starve yourself or spend hours in a gym everyday you are not being healthy. If you are eating junk food and sitting on the couch you are not being healthy. There is a middle ground. Guess what? Your husband would enjoy it if you both exercised (walking, hiking, biking, swimming, etc.) and ate healthy meals together.
   
3. Men find inter-beauty just as important. Your husband may have been attracted to you first physically, but it is your mental, emotional, and spiritual beauty that convinced him to make you his wife. If you are not making an effort in these areas it will not matter how much you make an effort in your physical appearance.

I grew up as an over-weight child and still as an adult. So, I completely understand the pain of feeling like you are always judged on physical appearance. For some of you to hear this it can add to your pain. But I would ask you to instead pray and be honest with yourself, "Do I make an effort in all these areas?" If I'm honest with myself, I am not making the effort with exercise. The simple truth is I hate doing it, but I have made a commitment to God, my husband, and myself to improve in this area.

God bless and let Him search your heart.